


Gold Star

by vulturer



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, PWP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-24
Updated: 2011-10-24
Packaged: 2017-10-24 22:30:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/268597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vulturer/pseuds/vulturer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“What are these?”<br/>“Umm… excuse me?”<br/>“These… protrusions from your chest… What are they?”<br/>“They’re… boobs?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gold Star

**Author's Note:**

> Written for an adorable kink meme prompt.

  
**  
Gold Star   
**

____________________________________________________

  


"What are these?"

"Umm... excuse me?"

"These... protrusions from your chest... What are they?"

"They're... boobs?"

"Oh."

"Umm..."

"..."

"Karkat... "

"...What."

"Pfff..."

And with a quiet splutter coupled with a desperate attempt to stifle herself that lasted approximately 1.5 seconds, Jade snorted once, collapsed back onto the pile of squiddles, and dissolved into hysterical laughter. As she covered her face and rolled back and forth, fluctuating between gasping for breath and bubbly screams, Karkat stared down at her as if she had suddenly transformed into a giant squeakbeast or something equally ridiculous. _She_ was ridiculous. He _felt_ ridiculous. Half-naked and sitting on a pile of fucking stuffed sea creatures, lips still sticky from her tropical fruit chapstick, and Jade was just _beside herself._ This was horribly and utterly _ridiculous._

"Wow, way to completely ruin the fucking mood Harley. Good work."

"Karkat, you asked me about my _boobs,_ how am I _supposed_ to react to that?" she managed to choke back in between giggle and snorts, and remained hiding behind her hands. Karkat rolled his eyes, sighed, and shuffled until he had his elbow propped on a bent knee so that he could drop his forehead into his hand.

"Well _excuse me_ for asking a fucking question about a stupid alien biological feature."

"But they're _boobs!"_

"Human, we don't have 'boobs.'"

 _"Pbbahahaha!_ Oh my god, _stop,"_ Jade screamed and attempted to roll over and bury herself in the plush pile. _"Nooooo,_ this is so _embarrassing,_ oh my _god..."_

He could have bellowed with rage, he could have sucked in a breath and _tore her a new asshole_ , and good god did he ever want to, but he didn't. He just glared down at her back, exasperated and red-faced, and waited. She looked twisted and silly with the top half of her body turned to the pile, but with legs still tangled with his, her bare and creamy brown skin brushing up against his grey jeans. The only thing left on her was a bright green fabric thing she had called "boyshorts," which was yet another fucking moronic human spectacle of bullshit that made Karkat want to bash his head against a wall when he tried to understand. They were undergarments, simply a pair of fucking utilitarian attire, and yet, _just like everything else_ from their stupid planet, _had_ to be labeled with a gender.

He had never felt more irritated with his creation.

"All right, we get it. Karkat's a fucking ignorant laughingstock. That has now been put on every table, so can you _please_ stop losing your shit, because I'm dangerously close to losing mine."

"Okay, I'm sorry, okay... oh god..." she breathed as she regained her composure and rolled back to face him, blushing and grinning, and kind of different without her massive glasses. She had her strong arms crossed over her chest lightly and her stomach heaved as her breathing finally slowed down.

There was a moment of awkward silence as they stared at each other, both completely unsure of how to proceed after something like that. _Where do they even begin?_

"Um, sorry..."

"No, _I'm_ sorry."

"Well I'm sorrier!"

"Congrats! Gold star for you, then."

"Yay!" she chirped and sat up again, grinning wide and toothy in Karkat's face and he snorted, half in disgust and half in amusement. She giggled soft and light and then bonked her forehead against his. "All girls have them."

"Just girls?"

"Yep!"

"Why?"

"Uhh... it's... weird alien stuff, you probably wouldn't want to hear about it..."

"Fine, whatever."

"Okay, hehe."

"Fuckass."

"Fuckass!"

Karkat snorted again, this time all pleasure, and Jade leaned to kiss him with closed eyes, still laughing softly through her small nose. Her breath was warm against his nose and he puffed out his own little gust of air; drier than hers. Overall, humans seemed more watery, at least compared to himself. More squishy and soft, weaker he supposed, but Jade had certainly proven formidable. He had watched her fight; she wasn't graceful, but she was effective. Passionate. Impressive.

They touched lips gently and slow, feeling around the foreign teeth shapes with the tips of their tongues, and they shifted to get closer. The gap was closed as they moved to sit face to face with Jade's muscled legs draped around Karkat's hips, his knees propped up against her ribcage, and they breathed each other's air in between pecks. Jade tasted of fruits and salt — that chapstick again and some other hint that was probably left over from a snack — and Karkat inhaled the taste; it was so foreign, much milder than he expected, and her lips were wet and actually really amazing when he thought about it. After bouncing back and forth, arguing endlessly with himself as she touched her tongue against his, he resigned himself to feeling attracted to an alien (which was admittedly difficult, considering how infuriating and flippant this one was in particular), and reveled in the fact that it seemed to be mutual.

 _All_ of her was starting to become attractive; he supposed even beautiful (a heady mix of curves and ruggedness), and he felt a nagging desire to figure her out. She had already cheated by unabashedly asking the other trolls about their genetic makeup and physiques, but he had nothing on her, and he decided to change that. So... the chest protrusions. Might as well start there.

He slid his hands to her collarbone and she paused for a fluttering moment before moving her own hands to his shoulders, biting at his lips playfully, and... okay. Slowly. See if this works.

A collarbone, skin with a heartbeat, and then... they were soft. Round and soft, small and kind of perfect in his calloused hands, and she let out a flickering moan as she slipped her own hands up into Karkat's messy curls before wrapping around his horns. So, yes. Yes, it worked. Oh god, did it _ever._

"Okay?"

"Shut up," she whispered and moved to kiss his neck, and he grinned, laughing briefly before running his fingers over the little pointed circles. Again with that bubbly giggle; she rubbed against the scalp around his horns, laughing against his neck, chest shaking underneath his hands and _god yes, he really liked these... boob things, what the fuck ever, stupid name for an apparently not-so-stupid adaptation, and they were apparently touch-sensitive, so... maybe... he could... oh, why the fuck not._

He pushed at her slightly and bent forward to flick a tongue at one of the little nubs and her laugh became breathy and she scratched her nails into his scalp, which definitely pulled a groan out of his throat. _Watch the teeth,_ he thought to himself and sucked softly on her, cupping the other one with his hand and then _oh fuck, oh fuck, what is she doing,_ she was reaching town to rub at the front of his jeans and then this whole thing was suddenly far less hesitant exploration, and far more _you got it, you've figured it out, now less thinking and more goddamn doing._

He tipped her forward and fell into the pile, smiling to himself at her cheerful laughter, and pushed his clothed bulge in between her legs. He rutted gently up against that smooth, strangely bulgeless curve while he lapped at her chest, humming as warm jolts shot through his system. It felt so good and so right, warm and inviting, alien, bizarre, yet wonderfully familiar and comfortable all of a sudden. This was so _amazing,_ so _uncomplicated,_ and he pushed against her with a need he hadn't expected to feel.

She responded in kind, massaging the base of his horns so perfectly, so _perfectly_ , they moved together so fast and so _perfectly_ , and they pushed each other closer to the edge so fucking _perfectly._ She slid down when he thrust up, the friction of fabric giving just that extra bit of something, something necessary, and then Karkat was just breathing into the crevice between Jade's little, soft spheres and she was gripping his horns like handholds. Just seconds, just gentle breathing moments and then she shuddered against him, whining and breathing and when she finally stilled, glistening with sweat and dazed, Karkat slipped a hand underneath his jeans and stared at her, drank in the sight of her messy hair, the red spots where his lips had sucked, and he came furiously into his hand with choking growls and eyes squeezed shut.

As the rush of climax slowly faded away, Karkat lay down gently on top of Jade, breathing heavily and drunkenly against the soft mounds of her chest, and she wrapped her arms loosely around his neck. They lay there silently, sticky and blissful in the plushy embrace of the pile. Neither wanted to move (or, frankly, had the energy to), so they didn't. They just stayed for a moment in the quietness, and it was so nice.

"So?"

"Hrmph."

"Hehe, whaddya think?"

"About?"

"About, uh... well..."

"I think..." he started and then breathed deeply in satisfaction, nuzzling up against her chest like a cat, and she laughed happily and ran her fingers through his hair. "I think that humans aren't so fucking awful after all."

"Gold star!"

He snorted and flicked at her arm and she giggled like always, like she hopefully always would, like he knew he would always remember. 

"Gold star."


End file.
